micster (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} micster) wrote,@ 2009-06-30 21:00:00 |
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Thought of the Day [30.06.2009]
[30.06.2009]
They Must Be Some Fucking Tasty Crisps
Now a while back I posted up an article about some oooold prostitutes who gave away sex for things such as like 1 cigarette or something ridiculous like that. But in America a similar sort of situation has happened with a 36 year old prostitute. But it wasnt anything like some fags for her to smoke. Oh no. It was a box full of Frito-Lay crisps. Now I dont know what Frito-Lay is so im assuming its just a thing over in America, but the case was the same value was £18. So what happened? Well stereotypical story, man is having marriage problems and wants some fun. Picks up the prostitute but then OH NO he doesnt have any cash on him so he points out the case of crisps. Then she agreed to be paid with them but then the police came and they got arrested. So this is the thing, you must have a really low opinion of yourself if you'd just give entry to your vageen just for a packet of crisps. I mean going back to that other story from a while back, they were old women with exceedingly loose entry points. This is just a 36 year old. I mean thats not that old compared with how they were like in there 70's. See now I dont know much about prostitutes but surely a fuck costs more than $30, which is what these crisps were. I mean with the story theres some things missing. I mean when he said that she could have the crisps what did he say? He could've said anything. He coulda said 'These are very special crisps, If you eat these then your tits grow even bigger. And that means more customers!'. We just dont know. Then again imagine crisps which actually make your tits get bigger. I mean what would happen if a guy ate some? Would he grow some moobs? I think im getting a bit off point here but basically if you are a prostitute then dont give up entry so cheaply. I mean at least haggle for a pot of dip at least.
Weather Moronity
You know all those stereotypes about the British? Well they arnt all right. I mean not all of us have awful teeth and not all of us are pug ugly. I drink a lot of tea so I cant say much about that, but im not thinking of any of these. Im thinking of how British people always talk about the weather. The thing is its totally true. Whenever your in the public you'll always here [mostly] old women talking about it. 'Oooh isnt it hot today' 'Oooh its wet today'. That sort of thing. But the thing is, ive just got to talk about the weather because im feeling like im going to melt or im going to drown. Drown in my own melted body? That'd be interesting .. Anyway does me talking about the weather make me an old woman? Well not really, I dont have droopy tits like them. Anyway weather. Like I said yesterday I was in Birmingham yesterday all day. I had to carry around an umbrella because I took one. Why? Well I was told it was going to completely piss itself down. But did it? Well .. no. It was a boiling day. I was really clamming up and needing many a drink. On top of that I was carrying around an umbrella in the sun like a complete loon. But almost before I left Birmingham I got a text saying how it had been completely pissing itself down back home with thunder and all that jazz.. And yeah I get on the train and tada, rain. But this is the thing. It was raining but it was really sunny and REALLY warm at the same time. I was boiling and wet which is a bit of an odd mixture. I saw a rainbow though. Aww. I got home and it was still raining but still really warm. So much so I actually had a fan on which thusly electrocuted me and sliced a bit of my thumb off. The same bloody thing is happening today, rain but really warm meaning if I open my big window then its like monsoon season in my bloody room. NOT GOOD. I know I moan about many a thing but I havent talked about how cunty the weather is before, but seriously I dont understand it. Yes its summer now meaning woo sun and warmth. But rain too? I mean you cant go out and enjoy the sun. But I could have just expressed all of that if I put on a grey wig, some massive glasses and went 'Ooh isnt it rainy but warm today' to some old woman at a bus station.
The Suicide Factor
I think we can all agree on one thing, Suicide Isnt Funny. Neither is threatening suicide a la every teeny popper in the land in the past few years. So if you auditioned for The X Factor and were shit, do you think threatening suicide would make the judges let you through? I mean its an interesting theory. Because all Mr Cowell knows, you'll go out back and slash SIMON into your arm and then who'd look even more like a prick. Anyway I wasnt just randomly thinking of this one day theoretically, Because this has actually happened. Yes we know The X Factor is filming its auditions at the moment and so this story has come out. Apparently it was a woman in her 50's at the London Auditions. She got rejected by all 4 of the judges and then in her post interview thing she went into a huge crying screaming ragefest. Then she ran away saying how she was going to kill herself. I mean im wondering why. Usually little kids cry and rage just to get attention and I think thats whats happening here. Going back to the teeny kids, its exactly the same with them. I was once sitting on a bus hearing some emokid who was probably about 14 telling her friends all about her various scars and cutting techniques. It was fucking disgusting but I guess thats what the youth is like now. So is this 50 year old just a big kid and thinking if she would do all of this then suddenly Simon et al would go 'Alright you wernt that bad, you can go through'. Cos we know what would happen then, dont we. She'd be told no in the next stage and do her suicide act again. And again. And again. And again. I quite honestly have no respect for this woman, whoever she is. She is in her 50's and is crying saying how shes going to kill herself because of how she didnt get through in a talent competition which thousands of people enter? My mom is in her 50's and she wouldnt be that much of a gigantic twat. You could say the woman probably had mental problems but I dont know. I just hope ITV dont wuss out and do actually show us her audition. Who knows, maybe she'll change her mind when she actually hears how bad she was. Or it'll drive her over the edge to suicideville.
Masses Of Money For Masses Of Pleasure
What gives you pleasure? Im sure a lot of various answers will be given to this and im sure a lot of them would be sickening but seriously. I mean is it backrubs, certain types of porn, a fleshlight . . . Well basically whatever it is, imagine if you were given £20k to investigate that area of stuff. Well someone is being given a £20k grant to look at women's bums. To 'Explore Cultural Attitudes Towards Female Buttocks'. Now you know where this grant has come from? The National Lottery. Now I doubt many non England people will know what this means but basically from every lottery ticket a bit of the money goes into this fund. Bits of this fund is given to charities and stuff but, well, looks like there giving it to any random person now. The 'artist' is going to make plaster cast moulds of women's bums to try and understand the cultural meaning of the bottom. So basically the person just wants to get there hands on loads of bums and have a good old feel? I see. I mean is this what public money should be used for? I dont think so really.. But do you know what the most shocking bit of this whole story is? The person who has been given the money to do this project is a WOMAN. MIND = BLOWN. I mean you'd expect this sort of thing to be done by a guy, really. Hell I wouldnt mind doing that, I'd do it for free - You wouldnt have to pay. But what can we conclude from that. Public money from the Lottery Fund is being given to a possible lesbian to feel up other women's arses.
Fuck I Love England
-micster x
[30.06.2009]
They Must Be Some Fucking Tasty Crisps
Now a while back I posted up an article about some oooold prostitutes who gave away sex for things such as like 1 cigarette or something ridiculous like that. But in America a similar sort of situation has happened with a 36 year old prostitute. But it wasnt anything like some fags for her to smoke. Oh no. It was a box full of Frito-Lay crisps. Now I dont know what Frito-Lay is so im assuming its just a thing over in America, but the case was the same value was £18. So what happened? Well stereotypical story, man is having marriage problems and wants some fun. Picks up the prostitute but then OH NO he doesnt have any cash on him so he points out the case of crisps. Then she agreed to be paid with them but then the police came and they got arrested. So this is the thing, you must have a really low opinion of yourself if you'd just give entry to your vageen just for a packet of crisps. I mean going back to that other story from a while back, they were old women with exceedingly loose entry points. This is just a 36 year old. I mean thats not that old compared with how they were like in there 70's. See now I dont know much about prostitutes but surely a fuck costs more than $30, which is what these crisps were. I mean with the story theres some things missing. I mean when he said that she could have the crisps what did he say? He could've said anything. He coulda said 'These are very special crisps, If you eat these then your tits grow even bigger. And that means more customers!'. We just dont know. Then again imagine crisps which actually make your tits get bigger. I mean what would happen if a guy ate some? Would he grow some moobs? I think im getting a bit off point here but basically if you are a prostitute then dont give up entry so cheaply. I mean at least haggle for a pot of dip at least.
Weather Moronity
You know all those stereotypes about the British? Well they arnt all right. I mean not all of us have awful teeth and not all of us are pug ugly. I drink a lot of tea so I cant say much about that, but im not thinking of any of these. Im thinking of how British people always talk about the weather. The thing is its totally true. Whenever your in the public you'll always here [mostly] old women talking about it. 'Oooh isnt it hot today' 'Oooh its wet today'. That sort of thing. But the thing is, ive just got to talk about the weather because im feeling like im going to melt or im going to drown. Drown in my own melted body? That'd be interesting .. Anyway does me talking about the weather make me an old woman? Well not really, I dont have droopy tits like them. Anyway weather. Like I said yesterday I was in Birmingham yesterday all day. I had to carry around an umbrella because I took one. Why? Well I was told it was going to completely piss itself down. But did it? Well .. no. It was a boiling day. I was really clamming up and needing many a drink. On top of that I was carrying around an umbrella in the sun like a complete loon. But almost before I left Birmingham I got a text saying how it had been completely pissing itself down back home with thunder and all that jazz.. And yeah I get on the train and tada, rain. But this is the thing. It was raining but it was really sunny and REALLY warm at the same time. I was boiling and wet which is a bit of an odd mixture. I saw a rainbow though. Aww. I got home and it was still raining but still really warm. So much so I actually had a fan on which thusly electrocuted me and sliced a bit of my thumb off. The same bloody thing is happening today, rain but really warm meaning if I open my big window then its like monsoon season in my bloody room. NOT GOOD. I know I moan about many a thing but I havent talked about how cunty the weather is before, but seriously I dont understand it. Yes its summer now meaning woo sun and warmth. But rain too? I mean you cant go out and enjoy the sun. But I could have just expressed all of that if I put on a grey wig, some massive glasses and went 'Ooh isnt it rainy but warm today' to some old woman at a bus station.
The Suicide Factor
I think we can all agree on one thing, Suicide Isnt Funny. Neither is threatening suicide a la every teeny popper in the land in the past few years. So if you auditioned for The X Factor and were shit, do you think threatening suicide would make the judges let you through? I mean its an interesting theory. Because all Mr Cowell knows, you'll go out back and slash SIMON into your arm and then who'd look even more like a prick. Anyway I wasnt just randomly thinking of this one day theoretically, Because this has actually happened. Yes we know The X Factor is filming its auditions at the moment and so this story has come out. Apparently it was a woman in her 50's at the London Auditions. She got rejected by all 4 of the judges and then in her post interview thing she went into a huge crying screaming ragefest. Then she ran away saying how she was going to kill herself. I mean im wondering why. Usually little kids cry and rage just to get attention and I think thats whats happening here. Going back to the teeny kids, its exactly the same with them. I was once sitting on a bus hearing some emokid who was probably about 14 telling her friends all about her various scars and cutting techniques. It was fucking disgusting but I guess thats what the youth is like now. So is this 50 year old just a big kid and thinking if she would do all of this then suddenly Simon et al would go 'Alright you wernt that bad, you can go through'. Cos we know what would happen then, dont we. She'd be told no in the next stage and do her suicide act again. And again. And again. And again. I quite honestly have no respect for this woman, whoever she is. She is in her 50's and is crying saying how shes going to kill herself because of how she didnt get through in a talent competition which thousands of people enter? My mom is in her 50's and she wouldnt be that much of a gigantic twat. You could say the woman probably had mental problems but I dont know. I just hope ITV dont wuss out and do actually show us her audition. Who knows, maybe she'll change her mind when she actually hears how bad she was. Or it'll drive her over the edge to suicideville.
Masses Of Money For Masses Of Pleasure
What gives you pleasure? Im sure a lot of various answers will be given to this and im sure a lot of them would be sickening but seriously. I mean is it backrubs, certain types of porn, a fleshlight . . . Well basically whatever it is, imagine if you were given £20k to investigate that area of stuff. Well someone is being given a £20k grant to look at women's bums. To 'Explore Cultural Attitudes Towards Female Buttocks'. Now you know where this grant has come from? The National Lottery. Now I doubt many non England people will know what this means but basically from every lottery ticket a bit of the money goes into this fund. Bits of this fund is given to charities and stuff but, well, looks like there giving it to any random person now. The 'artist' is going to make plaster cast moulds of women's bums to try and understand the cultural meaning of the bottom. So basically the person just wants to get there hands on loads of bums and have a good old feel? I see. I mean is this what public money should be used for? I dont think so really.. But do you know what the most shocking bit of this whole story is? The person who has been given the money to do this project is a WOMAN. MIND = BLOWN. I mean you'd expect this sort of thing to be done by a guy, really. Hell I wouldnt mind doing that, I'd do it for free - You wouldnt have to pay. But what can we conclude from that. Public money from the Lottery Fund is being given to a possible lesbian to feel up other women's arses.
Fuck I Love England
-micster x
